


Kiss and Makeup

by sablesheep



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, awkward teenage moments, makeup related misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-02
Updated: 2013-01-02
Packaged: 2017-11-23 08:29:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/620112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sablesheep/pseuds/sablesheep
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kanaya's lipstick is devastatingly attractive. When it's on her lips, that is. Not so much when it's all over Rose's neck, where it makes her look like she's been strangled. </p><p>(alternately: that awkward moment when your brother thinks your space vampire girlfriend is abusing you... and then walks in on you. with her.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kiss and Makeup

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by a makeup demo for my Porrim cosplay in which lipstick smudges made me look like I'd been punched in the face.

The most inconvenient thing about dating Kanaya is her lipstick. It is, of course, incredibly sexy. Rose has always been a red lipstick girl but lately, it's seeming more and more that she's being swayed towards the complimentary side. Green looks good on Kanaya-- against her bright white skin and those gorgeous yellow eyes. Rose has watched her apply it so many times it's almost become its own special variety of fetish. Kanaya can apply her lipstick with the same amount of effort it takes most people to slip into a pair of shoes, with two flicks of her wrist and a critical-eyed stare in the mirror.

In short, Rose thinks to herself as she wanders down one of their meteor's many hallways towards the kitchen, Kanaya is gorgeous. And her lipstick is just one of the many, many elements of her allure. The only downside to it is that she uses lipstick that is impressively long-lasting. Insofar that once it makes contact with human skin, it does not want to come off. She glowers down at the splotches covering her shoulders and sternum and reaches up to rub frantically at her neck where she knows more jade-green smudges are lingering. 

She knows Kanaya is going to be waiting for her in her bedroom because when Rose had torn herself away from her lips half an hour ago with a mutter of: "God I need coffee" Kanaya had huffed: "Well make it snappy."

Even her wrists weren't spared the assault. That's what comes of trying to get the upper hand of Kanaya-- not a single inch of you comes out lipstick free. Downside of dating a vampire, apparently. She huffs heartily and straightens her scarf, then her skirt, then her shirt. She needs to go back to her room and find her makeup remover before anyone sees any of this. She doesn't care if it's the blind kid, the clown, the grumpy one or her brother-- she doesn't want to deal with the innuendo.

But she needs coffee. She really needs her coffee, as terrible as she knows it's going to be. Coffee and something a little more substantial, especially in the form of a coffee cake because she is incredibly hungry. Back on earth there was probably some sort of record about how many calories the average human burns in two hours of making out with their paranormal girlfriend in an unused supply room turned love nest of pillows and expensive yarn. But here, hurtling through space at millions of miles per hour, she has no access to that sort of information. Well, not without asking Dave to look it up for her since he hates sharing the computer with Google access. 

She places her hand on the latch of the kitchen door and it slides open with a hiss. Rose steps inside with her head held low because, well, Dave's sitting there at the countertop hooked up to his laptop and she's covered in her girlfriend's lipstick. 

"Yo." He says in acknowledgement, raising a hand and nodding. "Sup Lalonde."

"Mmm not much." She says, pulling her scarf a little higher. "I-- Um-- was-- just--"

Oh good lord why had she said anything at all? Now she was going to have to make up a convincing lie. "--Color coding my yarn."

"...Sounds fun." As she steps out from behind the fridge, Dave is eyeing her nervously. Rose gives him a cordial arch of the eyebrows and pours herself a cup of coffee because damnit there's nothing in the fridge and she certainly doesn't feel like spending the next twenty minutes figuring out how to alchemize something. She just wants to get this lipstick off of her and maybe take a nap. Or, well, make out with Kanaya some more. 

"Um. Rose." Dave is actually taking off his sunglasses and-- oh god please don't ask what she thinks he's going to ask. No questions about her sex life, please, because she doesn't want to try to elaborate how that works. Lesbian sex is one thing, intergalactic lesbian sex is another thing and intergalactic lesbian sex with a rainbowdrinker when you yourself happen to be a practitioner of the black arts is a tome written in elfish by a drunken JRR Tolkien and translated to French then to Medieval Latin by someone who speaks neither language. 

To summarize: she doesn't want to talk to Dave about sex. At all. Unless it's discussing the sex lives of someone who is neither herself or anyone in the immediate vicinity. 

"Rose, I'm sorry-- I know it's personal and it's, y'know-- not my place and all but--" Dave sounds uncharacteristically nervous and repeatedly runs his fingers through his hair. He pinches the bridge of his nose, takes a deep breath and starts to speak once more but she cuts him off.

"Dave please, don't. I can't. I just can't." Rose slams her coffee mug on the tabletop and covers her ears with her hands. The gesture makes her scarf shift a few inches and she hears his breath come in with a strangled 'urk'.

Dave gets to his feet and reaches across the counter for her. Rose takes two steps out of his grasp because, well, oh god what is he doing? "But you can't let her do that to you--"

"What we do in the privacy of our-- whatever-- really isn't something I want to discuss."

"Damn Rose, I thought you were all into feminism and junk."

Oi. Just because she might not be on top doesn't mean she's any less of a feminist. And how does he know any of this anyways? Assumption? Spies in the heating ducts? Oh god has The Clown been watching them while they have passionate intercourse? Why don't they check things like that! "Yes-- well-- just because she's-- I mean-- Dave I really can't-- I don't want to--"

Rose is flustered-- more flustered than she thought she'd be. It's hard enough being sixteen in space, it's even harder when you're asked to answer specific questions about your hormonal development. Specifically your hormonal development with your alien girlfriend.

"Dave things are just-- difficult enough-- I mean-- I love her-- I really do and she's just a little-- possessive at times but--"

"Rose I know you love her but-- damn you can't let her walk all over you." Dave is looking more upset by the syllable and Rose wants to punch him in the face for pulling the dominant male act because like fuck is she going to let him tell her how she should be having sex.

LESBIAN, is what she wants to shout and throw her coffee mug at his head. I'M DATING A VAMPIRE AND I'M A LESBIAN. YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT SEX WHEN IT COMES TO EITHER OF THOSE THINGS.

And if he does she's going to kill him because there is exactly one gorgeous jade-blooded rainbowdrinker in their circle of acquaintanceship -- oh. Well. Two. But she doesn't like to think about Porrim too much because Kanaya has the tendency to get excited about things when it comes to her dancestress because-- well they're not going to talk about that either.

"Excuse me, Dave, but I'm really not too comfortable discussing this with you." Rose says, her voice low and icy. "And I would appreciate it, if, in the future you refrain from judging my relationship."

And with that she sweeps out of the room with as much dignity as she can muster when she's covered in green lipstick and just remembered she is, in fact, wearing Kanaya's bra instead of her own. And it's on backwards.

So, in the spirit of authorial honesty, she must admit she has absolutely dignity left at all. Other than moral dignity. And that she... no longer has any of that either. She's pretty sure losing her virginity to a vampire kind of destroys her standing within anyone's moral code. Especially since they didn't wait for marriage. And, well, they both have vaginas. Or, um, reproductive organs that are somewhat similar to vaginas.

Errggh this is too difficult. Rose wishes she could slam the door behind her. Instead she stomps off down the hallway to her bedroom-- which is an actual bedroom, as opposed to Kanaya's room which just sort of looks like an Amy Butler fabric display reproduced with a botanical garden and left their offspring to incubate. It's bright, it's beautiful but there's really no comfortable place to sit around and cuddle.

When she gets into the room with her coffee mug clutched in her hands she's relatively startled to be confronted with Kanaya sprawled out on her bed. Sprawled out on her bed wearing her dressing gown-- hers as in Rose's-- and not much else. Okay, not anything else. 

Rose wants to pretend to be surprised. She wants to be taken aback and she wants to play it coy but, well. Nope. They're at that point where she'd prefer to crawl up onto the mattress beside her and kiss her senseless instead of putting off the inevitable. (Addendum: the incredibly enjoyable inevitable).

"My brother was just questioning me about our sex life." She says, as blasé as possible. She sets her coffee cup on top of her dresser and wonders what she did to deserve this sort of treatment. What wonderful, wonderful thing did she do to have such an incredibly attractive woman always lusting after her? Other than have similar urges, that is. Reciprocity is... well... it's something. But now it pretty much matters that they both leave the room happy with what's occurred. 

Kanaya, busy reapplying her lipstick-- lying down without a mirror, how the hell does she do that-- glances over at Rose and raises her eyebrows. In the dimly light room her every expression has the spotlight and her eyebrows are like a pair of melodramatic actors. "Oh?"

"I didn't know what to say so I verbally bitched slapped him back to the Elizabethan era." Rose fumbles through her vanity for her makeup removing wipes—one moment she's grateful that Gamzee exists-- and starts to rub the lipstick off her wrists. Kanaya watches her with the half-lidded eyes of a predator and Rose gives her a smirk. 

"If he begins speaking in nothing but iambic sonnets I may be forced to cull him for the safety of humanity." Kanaya sits up a little and Rose gives her a giggle because she looks absolutely ridiculous in Rose's tangerine orange bathrobe. "I don't abide such silliness unless it's purely Shakespearean."

Rose flops onto her bed beside Kanaya and kisses her cheek, leaving behind a black smudge. "Ahh, a woman after my own heart."

"I thought I had that already." Kanaya snakes her arms around her waist and pulls her close. Given everything she was just discussing with Dave, Rose almost feels like batting her away and asking 'why am I never in charge' but, well, she really doesn't give a damn. Kanaya seems like she knows what she's doing and Rose really doesn't have any complaints. So when Kanaya leans over her and starts in at her neck once more, Rose simply reaches up and runs her fingers through her hair. 

"Well. Yes, you do." Rose says after a bit of a delay, busy trying to find the spot at the base of Kanaya's horns that makes her go a little green around her perfectly sculpted cheekbones. She finds it successfully and then there's a pair of teeth in her throat and a hand fumbling with the hem of her shirt. 

"I'm after something else now." Kanaya whispers directly into Rose's ear and the feeling makes Rose gasp and dig her fingernails into her shoulders. "Something... far... more... elusive."

"Kanaya we just spent an hour making out in an abandoned room." Rose mutters, grinning. "I'd hardly call our sex life 'elusive'.

"Shhhh. I'm trying to be a big scary predator." Kanaya whispers, working her way down Rose's throat. "The least you can do, my love, is pretend I'm being effective."

Rose curls a leg around Kanaya's waist, her heel digging into the small of her back. Kanaya trills in that special way that Rose finds incredibly exhilarating-- it's so foreign, so gorgeous, so perfectly scintillating-- and Rose can't help but purr in response. It's a poor approximation of Kanaya's noise but it makes Kanaya smile on her way to kiss her. "Oh, are you now?"

"Yes. I'm big and scary," Kanaya whispers, punctuating each word with a soft kiss, "And I'm going to eat you up alive."

"Oh, no! Goodness me! I'm swooning!" Rose mutters, her heart clearly not in her words. "Oh lord almighty! I need someone to come save me from the big, bad vampire."

"Mmmmhmm. Bad." Kanaya bites down. Hard. Rose lets out an involuntary squeal. Ugh she hates it when she makes noises like that because she sounds like a frightened child and--

"Kanaya, stop!" She begs, holding back her laughter as her girlfriend suddenly pulls away, her teeth bared comically as she growls. There's a few flecks of jade lipstick on them and a bit of Rose's own black and she looks ridiculous, so ridiculous and Rose wants to reach up and kiss her senseless but she's laughing too hard to hold her hands steady. "Kanaya no stop you're killing me! Ow oh god that hurts!"'

She's laughing so hard it feels like one of her ribs is in danger of rupturing and she's frantically attempting to disentangle her limbs from Kanaya's but it's not working too well because Kanaya's still being so endearingly silly and the words: 'You'll never escape, there's no hope for you now!' are all she hears before--

Her bedroom door slams open.

"OKAY SERIOUSLY I AM NOT GOING TO LET YOU BEAT UP ON MY SISTER-- OH my god what are you doing get off of her you're going to kill her!"

Kanaya stops pulling faces immediately and goes bright jade so fast Rose cold swear she was suddenly temperature sensitive. With a squeak she pulls the duvet up over her and Rose forces herself to stop giggling long enough to give Dave her worst glare.

"Dave. Dave what the hell are you doing."

"I'm not just going to sit around and let you get beaten up by your scary lesbian alien girlfriend-"

"Not a lesbian; her species doesn't have gender."

"Well, we do it's just not important for reproductive reasons, darling."

"Yes, I know love, but this is hardly the time for semantics."

"Well if this isn't the time for semantics I don't know what is." Kanaya mutters, pulling out her lipstick and carefully reapplying it. She leans over and kisses Rose on the cheek once more, surely leaving behind a green splotch. "You're so darling when you get outraged."

"Stop covering me in your lipstick you melodramatic she-demon." Rose snarls, showing her own eyeteeth. Kanaya snarls playfully in return and ohh god she should not be so turned on by how sharp her teeth are.

"Hey-- just-- what the fuck is going on here-- because-- I mean--"

"I think it's self-explanatory Mr. Strider." Kanaya murmurs, glancing from Rose's disheveled state to her own with a suggestive smirk and a tweak of her eyebrows up and down. "Your sister and myself were about to partake in the incredibly enjoyable act of coitus. I believe what you are doing can be described as 'coitus interruptus?"

"...Uh. What?"

"We're going to have sex, Dave. Lots of sex. Look at me I'm completely covered in lipstick." Rose raises her arms, pulls back her shirtsleeves and loosens her scarf. "Dave I am completely covered in lip prints. I look like I was attacked by a lipstick monster."

"As opposed to a monster wearing lipstick, which you were actually attacked by."

"Yo yo yo-- Hold up hold up." Dave's covering his face with his hands and making clearly displeased noises. "Um- so-- Kanaya's not beating you?"

"Pardon me?" Kanaya sounds a little confused. "Rose-- what exactly did you tell him we're doing?"

"...Oh god." Rose claps her hands to her neck, her eyes going wide with sudden realization. She stares down at her arms which are still peppered in Kanaya's lipstick. "Oh god-- Dave-- these aren't bruises."

"Yeah. Yeah kind of picking up on that. Um. Wow this is really awkward." Dave drops his head into his hands. "Wow I am the world's biggest asshole. Just. You know. Assuming that your alien girlfriend was treating you like a punching bag because-- you know--"

"No-- oh my god-- no-- Dave I am so sorry." Rose gapes, going bright pink and wrapping her arms around herself. Okay. Well. That made a lot more sense now. A lot more sense than, um, Dave wanting to know the nuances of her sex life. Rose lets out a groan and hides her own face in her own hands. "Oh my god this is so embarrassing."

Kanaya sits up, blankets still clutched self-consciously to her chest and whispers to Rose: "Why are you sorry?"

"He saw me covered in your lipstick all the time and thought you were-- you know-- abusing me?" Rose responds, gesticulating wildly. She's hoping the concept she's trying to convey is a universal one. Even though Alternian culture is fraught with violence she's pretty sure that spousal abuse is frowned upon.

...On second thought, considering the number of times she's been bitten in the past few days maybe it's not. Oh god. Things she should have thought about. 

Kanaya blinks, twice, and her eyebrows furrow a little bit. It's a classic Kanaya expression, one that Rose has become a little too familiar with to enjoy anymore. It's her 'human culture is a beautiful thing and I hate not understanding it' face. "...I don't understand."

"Just-- Just-- oh god-- Dave do you want to try to explain this one?"

"No. No I am not shacking up with the vampire so I do not need to set up a safeword." Dave is already shuffling for the door, his eyebrows raised high behind his sunglasses. 

"Oh, we did that already." Kanaya chirps, far too openly and cheerfully for her own good. "You have to be responsible about these things, you know. Especially when, you know--"

Dave starts to choke. "OH MY GOD DID I ASK?"

"Well you did bring it up." Kanaya says, mulishly, slumping into Rose's side and pressing her lips to her neck. Rose can feel her pouting and lets out a quiet giggle.

"I just-- dude-- I mean-- God look I just wanted to be sure that you weren't-- okay, your hot alien girlfriend chick isn't beating the shit out of you and you seem pretty happy so you know-- promise I'll never pull the knight in shining brotherly armor act ever again." Dave salutes them both. "Scout's honor."

He vanishes as quickly as he'd shown up, the door clanging shut with surprising vehemence.

"...Does this mean he'll be angry if he finds out I like to tie you up?"

"Shut up Kanaya and stop getting your lipstick all over me before Terezi shows up thinking she needs to dispense domestic justice."

"I still don't understand what domestic abuse means--"

"Just shut up and kiss me, okay?" Rose mutters, throwing herself back onto the mattress. Kanaya still looks less than convinced but it never takes much coaxing to get her back and ready to kiss. "Look me in the eyes, look at my beautiful pale skin and remember what you are."

"...A confused, horny teenager?"

"No. A powerful, sexy vampire. But also that thing." Rose pulls Kanaya's face down to her own and does her best to be distracting. She is incredibly successful. Kanaya returns to trying to shimmy her out of her shirt in moments and then, before Rose has a chance to tease her about having a ridiculous libido, Kanaya is working her magic.

She might not have wanted to admit it to her brother but, well, she loves it when Kanaya takes charge. She's not always in charge, mostly because on occasion she's too sleepy to initiate things. Kanaya knows what she's doing-- she really does. 

They're kissing like they haven't seen each other for years and Kanaya's recently returned from the warfront and all she's had to remind her of home over the past sixty two months of being on the front lines was a lock of her sweetheart's hair and-- ugh this metaphor would work so much better if Kanaya was human. Basically they're kissing and it's nice and there's a lot of tongue, okay? Is there anything else she can really say?

Maybe she can mention the fact that Kanaya's lips are always just a little chapped. Not so bad that she needs chapstick but just enough that they're a little rough. Rose wonders if it's from the fact that she uses so much lipstick. Even if it's a conditioning formula she's pretty sure the amount of friction that's expended has to do something negative. 

Either way, her lips are always a little rough against Rose's, unlike her hands which are luxuriantly soft. When they kiss her hands feel like velvet up and down the back of her neck and Rose loves it. Kanaya knows it too because-- just now, for example-- she traces the protuberance of Rose's vertebrae just above her shoulder blades and whispers:

"You're so ticklish."

"I think you're mistaking ticklish for aroused." Rose murmurs, arching her neck back as Kanaya's fingers make their way across her chest with the dexterity of a master painter. 

Rose can't formulate words any more if she wants to because yes, there's Kanaya easing herself on top of her, those bright green lips standing out like an italicized type face in the middle of a bland text. Her weight has become almost familiar at this point, warm and pressing down in all the right places. Kanaya isn't warm or cold which makes it oddly comfortable to make out underneath a pile of blankets. Doesn't get as heated.

"Kanaya?" Rose finally murmurs, finding her breath long enough to formulate an entire sentence. "You know I love you, right?"

"Mmmhmm." Kanaya lifts her face from Rose's breast, an eyebrow raised. "Very much dear. And I reciprocate. However, as much as I appreciate the sentiment, might I get back to... what is it I was doing?"

"Pleasuring me beyond my wildest dreams?" Rose purrs, stretching out across the bed in what she hopes is a sensuous manner. Kanaya smirks and sits up, looking her over with a predatory stare.

"Oh yes, that. Let me get back to that, if you don't mind."

"Oh, by all means." Rose laughs and extends her arms. Kanaya giggles in turn and stretches out on top of her once more, nuzzling her neck and nipping playfully. “Just maybe, Kanaya darling… try not to get your lipstick all over the place this time?”


End file.
